You're not the only one Bro...

I recently met a guy on Bumble, and he lives and works in the same area that I do. I was surprised that we hadn’t run into each other prior out walking the dogs (*heart eyes* he has a German Shepherd too) or grocery shopping. Conversation flow to begin was nice and he asked for my number, cool. For some reason I always feel the need to say, “here text me *insert number here*” and they will text me. I appreciated that he asked and took initiative. Typical small talk took place and we chatted about our careers and where we wanted to be with our lives in a year from now. I told him I wanted to open another location for work and possibly be moved into a house with another dog. His ONE YEAR goal was to be married with a kid on the way….  I looked past that maybe thinking he was just joking. We started discussing our first date, where we wanted to go and what we wanted to do. He suggested dinner and drinks, I countered with just drinks. We agreed upon a local bar, date and time a few days out. The next day, he started talking about how he deleted his bumble and wasn’t going to talk to any other women. He told me he EXPECTED me to be exclusive after one date. Welp, I told him I wasn’t interested any longer and to no longer text me or contact me. Oof, what an exhausting concept. Being exclusive after ONE date? As Ariana Grade would say thank u, next.

I’ve been getting to know this guy I knew of from a few college classes. He moved to North Carolina for work and is moving back out here in a few weeks for work. He asked if I would be interested in grabbing dinner and drinks and again, I agreed for drinks or coffee. We ended up getting into a disagreement about how I made a joke about Tinder on snapchat and that it was disrespectful to be talking to other guys while I had plans to meet up with him. Yikes, well I guess he wouldn’t have been happy to know that I was also talking to some guy from Bumble and had plans to get drinks with him. Need I mind you, I hadn’t seen this guy since 2012, we’ve been silently watching each other on social for years but never really moved on it.

Since I recently moved an hour away from home, I found it hard to get to know people and well, didn’t know how to make friends since I always befriended people I worked with. I got actively involved in networking events and social events hoping that it would help, and I knew I would be able to make some connections. I’ve made some great friends within the group, but I’ve also met a guy who I was able to connect with. We grabbed lunch and drinks a few times and he was sweet enough to surprise me at work with coffee when he flew home from a work trip (very much appreciated). I could see things growing slowly but there wasn’t much progression. I was enjoying getting to know him and well all the random conversations I was having on Bumble and wherever else I talked to guys. He texted me one night asking if we could go for drinks and I told him I already had plans. He asked and I believe in transparency and honesty, so I told him I was going for drinks with so and so.  You could tell with his one and two worded responses that he was upset, and I can totally understand why. I can’t deny that I wouldn’t be upset either, but we’ve talked about this before. A few days later I texted him to see how he was and how work was going, he texted back “good bro. u?” Bro…

Ha, I am not going to put myself in a position to assume a sort of defined relationship until those discussions have happened and with how many people are looking for “casual” in this modern dating age, those discussions need to happen. But, until then, you’re not the only one bro…

XXO,

Ruger & Liz